guilty conscience fashion blog

I have a guilty conscience

  • Blue Jean Bebe
  • When your closet consists of 90 pastels Easter never really
  • Welcome to Canada smiledirectclub! Peter is so thrilled youll be
  • Hoppy Easter every bunny
  • In life sometimes you gotta stop and find the hidden
  • Dear coach why must you create the most conceptually creative
  • Perfect little Disney details! My favourite Mickey park shoes from
  • Found these overalls at a flea market in Amsterdamwhat are
  • I didnt choose the overall lifethe overall life chose me
  • preids very favourite attraction pictured behind me therehe just cant

A Very Mickey Christmas

New York, New York

Oh, how long it’s been since I last wrote you guys a little something on the blog. What can I say, the Holiday season and year end duties seem to have gotten the best of me, and there never seems to be enough hours in the day to accomplish all there is to do. That being said I am thrilled to finally be sharing new images right in time to wish you all the Merriest of Christmases, Happiest Hanukkahs, and Koolest Kwanzaas ever. This whole content creator journey of mine started right here on this very website, and I never tire of thanking all of you for following our lives and adventures from here, to Instagram, to YouTube and giving me the chance to live my life doing something I love everyday. Sorry for the cheese..what can I say…’tis the season to be super grateful.

We have been spending the last week with my folks in Florida and have indulged in some much needed family time and R&R. This year has been both a blast and a blur and the month of December arrived right in time to give our scattered little brains and bodies a little respite. I wouldn’t call it a full on vaca, but I haven’t posted a photo on Instagram in 2 days so I must be doing something right. The real vacation will arrive this coming Saturday morning when Peter, my folks and myself, will head off to Orlando to spend a very merry Christmas in the happiest place on earth. Even snowy Canada can’t rival with how festive Walt Disney World feels at this time of year. Though quite busy, it is one of my very favourite times to visit one of my very favourite places, and to be able to do it with my very favourite people almost feels too good to be true. Of course I will be sharing all of my magical Mickey adventures and outfits in real time on Instagram, but if this is the last I speak to you all before the dawn of yet another year, I wish you my readers, all the happiness, success, health, and love in the world. Thank you for another great one! 2019 should be cool…

Ray Ban “Ja-Jo”, La Marque puffer, Moschino for H&M sweater dress, Dior strap and “Saddle” bag, and Chanel boots.

Reunion

Montreal, Canada

“If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present.” ― Lao Tzu. Funny thing about the past…revisiting it can bring back all kinds of dark twisty things you were certain you had long moved on from. What’s up with the moody intro quote, you ask? Well folks I went to my 10 year high school reunion a couple weeks back and boy did it stir up a lot of shit. If you have been a reader for a while you know I have a fun little unpredictable ongoing battle with anxiety and depression, that I don’t talk about too often. It seems to rear it’s ugly heads when I expect it least, and always surprises me with how long and hard it sticks around.  

I consider myself a well adjusted human being. I let a lot of things roll off my back, don’t let what others think of me bother me too much, and rather move forward than muster up unwanted emotions that may lead me off the deep end. Peter has really helped me evolve from the anxy teen I was when he first met me, to the cool, calm and collected young adult(ish) human I am now…and boy am I ever thankful for that. That being said revisiting who I was then, and more importantly how I portrayed myself and was viewed by my peers and even teachers then, left a yucky stinging feeling in my heart. As those of you who deal with anxiety and depression may know, they rear their ugly heads in waves, and the tide can take a long time before it is still again. Recently I have felt tired, a little unmotivated, overly sensitive, and easily triggered. To put that into perspective, the episode of The Walking Dead I just watched, has lead me into enough of an existential crisis to write this post as honestly as I am right now. So instead of feeding the bad, I am going to give myself the advice I should have been hearing, facing, and believing since that day I came home feeling sorry about who I used to be.

As much as I may feel like I’m still 16, I am not…and that is a great thing. I have become a kind, open hearted person, who is always there in times of need, but wise enough to never be taken advantage of. I have grown to idolize women of substance who have taught me I am strong, capable anything, but most importantly that I am enough. That I should never dumb myself down for the comfort of others, or to make sure the joke lands at my expense. That though I may be underestimated, my worth, intelligence, hard working nature, and skill will no longer be…and to those who still think me a fool and dismiss me, are simply missing out. My accomplishments are my own, and their greatness cannot be syphoned by disbelief. Others’ words and actions do no control me, they do not affect me, and most importantly they do not define who I am. As much as I may feel like I’m still 16, I am not…and that is a great thing. 

So I am going to let the young girl I left on that pedestal all those years ago step down, and step up there myself. I am going to keep her joie de vivre, open heart, and faith in people, but realize that the change I have nurtured within myself is one of my greatest accomplishments. I am going to acknowledge the growth that has happened to her in the past 10 years, and will no longer shame her for who she was. We all think we know everything at that age, and isn’t it interesting to see how wrong we were…and how wrong we’ll probably be again looking back 10 years from now. Yet again the cliché seems to bring forth the most concise truth. I am who I am today, because of who she once was. Because of what WE went through, and the mistakes WE made. So it’s time to forgive her for them, and be at peace living in the present. Hey! if Lao Tzu said it right…

Gucci sunnies and shoes, Zara suit, Forever 21 sweater, and Dior “Saddle” bag.

Get a vibe of where this all started VINTAGE CC

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