guilty conscience fashion blog

Ecua-Andino

The Not So Grateful Dead

2016-01-10 at 13-49-17 Miami, Florida

I signed Peter and I up for something a little bit Looney Tunes late last year…it’s called the “Walker Stalker Cruise”, and yes it is a fan convention at sea for my favourite show, The Walking Dead. I know I’ve always been proud of my geek status, but this is the furthest I’ve ever taken it. This weekend I will be voluntarily embarking on a ship,  surrounded by only the most invested fans my kind has to offer, with the only method of escape being man overboard. The cast will be onboard for panels, Q&A’s, photo ops, autograph sessions…and hopefully some serious hanging out, as I intend on being cool as a cucumber when approaching Norman Reeds to be best friends all the while wearing my Mrs. Dixon wife-beater…ya he’s gonna love me. Who am I kidding…this cruise was fucking made for me! I’m a little afraid for the actors to be quite honest, they literally  signed up to be trapped on a vessel where every passengers’ single purpose is to bug the shit out of them, and I have a feeling some of them bite…Good luck cast! I’ll be on deck at 11 by the pool with tropical drinks on hand if you are looking for a bestie to share the plot of the second half of the 6th season with! If you’re interested in seeing  how this weekend’s adventure unfolds make sure to follow us on Instagram! Until then I’m going to practice my stealth stalking skills, poor Daryl Dixon won’t know know what’s coming for him… 2016-01-10 at 13-51-29 2016-01-10 at 13-49-07 2016-01-10 at 13-53-50 2016-01-10 at 13-50-18 2016-01-10 at 13-52-59 2016-01-10 at 13-51-38 2016-01-10 at 13-50-00 2016-01-10 at 13-52-23 2016-01-10 at 13-54-37 Recommended The Walking Dead to my mom…it’s been 2 days, she’s on season 3 and has yet to leave her room

Ecua-Andino Panama hat, Tom Ford sunglasses, vintage Grateful Dead tee, Chanel watch, Cartier bracelets, Kendall + Kylie for Topshop skirt, and Hermes Birkin and sandals.

Symptoms of Fun Include Exhaustion

2015-07-17 at 07-00-50 Bal Harbour, Florida

I write to you from my bed, slightly hungover, and leaving for Florida in approximately 9 hours. Unpacked, uninspired, and very fucking sleepy. We’ve spent the last few weekends driving from one place to another, for events that have kinda taken their toll on my meek little being. That’s right kids…I’m complaining due to fatigue caused by all the fun I’ve been having. From celebrating my best friend’s Dirty 30 in Wonderland to cooking up a storm (for them and eating for me) during our past cottage getaway, I’m elated and super pooped. You’d think all the carbs would fucking serve a purpose but no…I still refuse to listen to my Apple Watch’s command to get up as I simply don’t have the fucking energy. If exhaustion due enjoyment is a problem, I think it’s pretty much the best one to have. This little #OOTD felt right to post today as we are heading back to where it was photographed, the sunshine state! Surely that will be a restful adventure..NOT. My husband actually suggested we go to Disney World. I fuck with you not. What is he thinking dangling that shit in my face? Someone either really wanted to go to the happiest place on earth or he fucked up and I’m gonna find out real soon. Either way I don’t care..Mickey imma tired, but imma comin’! 2015-07-17 at 07-10-24 2015-07-17 at 06-58-55 2015-07-17 at 07-15-21 2015-07-17 at 07-08-46 2015-07-17 at 07-17-43 2015-07-17 at 06-57-04 2015-07-17 at 07-25-15 2015-07-17 at 07-14-06 2015-07-17 at 07-09-42 2015-07-17 at 07-04-38 2015-07-17 at 07-17-13 2015-07-17 at 07-19-07 What a whiny bitch looks like

Ecua-Andino Panama hat, Chanel necklace, Hermes & Cartier bracelets, Alexis blouse, Zara trousers, Mandy Coon Bunny bag, and Christian Louboutin wedges.

Chubby

2015-05-24 at 11-00-54 Parrot Cay, Turks & Caicos

My Grandma called me chubby yesterday. Not as an insult, but as a kind of loving remark as she embraced me goodbye. It sucked. I’ve always prided myself, on being the girl that doesn’t order the salad at the restaurant, that can’t contribute to the conversations about spinning or whatever the fuck the next fitness trend is, by being the one that just doesn’t care. Still, my positive body image wasn’t strong enough to take a comment from my sweet elderly relative. On the ride home, I began to wonder what people saw when they looked at me, and if their perception different from my own? I kept showing my mother images of girls asking “is she chubby?”, “how about her?”, forming some sort of scale and placing my recently discovered stats within her answers. Even though comparing yourself to others, I know is never the answer. Was I so oblivious, that I was the last one to find out I was fat by society’s standards? That was my fear, even though I wanted so badly not to give a shit.

I always tread a fine line between embracing my body and the freedom that entails (CHEESEBURGERS), and the desire to be disciplined and healthy, to wear what I want every morning because fat days simply wouldn’t exist. But which is more important, my integrity or my health? Also don’t get me wrong, staying healthy is a priority, but juicing is rarely used with that as a motive if you catch my drift. Health is the alibi, but skinny culture is the true motivation. So what does a girl do? Shrug off the “chubby” comment, order pizza and call it a day, or finish writing this post grab some cereal and go run 3 miles?  Does loving oneself, mean allowing yourself everything, or allowing yourself what is probably best for you? I wish I could end this post with a definite answer, with a pizza or cereal, but I can’t. Today I am leaning towards discipline and that has everything to do with my grandma’s comment even though I wish it didn’t. I will be an anarchist of skinny culture that conforms for her own health and happiness, and that is ok. Here’s is the truth, no matter your size, there will always be sweet grandmas or judgemental assholes who will give you their 2 cents about the way you look. I guess the answer really is doing what makes you happiest, not what you believe is pleasing others. That goes for all of you juicers and cheeseburger eaters out there. This way the next time someone calls you chubby you won’t pretend you don’t care, you truly won’t give a fuck. On that note, here are some semi-clothed pictures of me! Ironic or perfectly fitting, I’m not sure, but I guess either way it makes sense. 2015-05-24 at 11-04-06 2015-05-24 at 10-59-23 2015-05-24 at 11-05-30 2015-05-24 at 11-00-19 2015-05-24 at 11-02-09 2015-05-24 at 11-05-49 2015-05-24 at 11-01-29 2015-05-24 at 11-03-10 2015-05-24 at 10-58-07 That was way more serious then intended

Ecua-Andino Panama hat, Alexander McQueen scarf, Ray Ban Clubmasters, H&M kimono, Victoria’s Secret bathing suit, Aurelie Bidermann cuff, Rag & Bone shorts, and Hermes sandals.

Whiny Summer

2015-05-22 at 10-10-48 Parrot Cay, Turks & Caicos

This month has been absolute chaos…and by chaos I mean like really really busy! Summer vacation is never really a vacation is it? It was the shit in the sixth grade, now even when I think i’m taking time off, life has a funny way of filling up my schedule with grown up problems. Now let’s get back on topic…before I started to complain about how busy I’ve been, I did actually go on vacation. JESUS am I the fussiest individual over the age of 3 or what. These images were captured while on our one year anniversary trip in turks. As you have most probably noticed, this was pretty early on in the trip as I am pale as fuck. This mini #OOTD shoot was a bit of a complete fucking mess. Goldilocks style, I like to call it. First it was too bright, then too humid, and then well…good thing I was wearing a bathing suit. 2015-05-22 at 10-06-15 2015-05-22 at 10-06-37 2015-05-22 at 10-07-48 2015-05-22 at 10-07-25 2015-05-22 at 10-12-39 2015-05-22 at 10-09-57 2015-05-22 at 10-12-28 2015-05-22 at 10-10-51 2015-05-22 at 10-02-51 2015-05-22 at 10-23-08 Got Wet

Ecua-Andino panama hat, Cartier aviators, bracelets and watch, H&M and Givenchy necklaces, Apiece Apart off the shoulder top, Missoni bikini, Nadia Safti shorts,  and Chanel bag and sandals.